There might be others like me, but I doubt it; most people with blogs either seem to have no end to the amount of things they can write about, or else choose to abruptly end without any concern. The former is beyond me, and so I seem to be fixated with avoiding the latter fate, out of some quaint sense of loyalty to the blog itself (which, incidentally, is now three years old). I don't even want to think about how many times I've written these meta-posts, because it does not matter. Each one has been relevant, if uninteresting (even to me). It does beg the question of why I should write it at all, but again, it is as if the blog demands it...

The past year was pretty poor in terms of posting, and I have wanted to make it better. But try as I might, I cannot conjure up anything of interest, fictional or otherwise. My quality-control filter has become far harsher, and I reject a lot more than I used to. I suppose that is good, but I cannot help but feel as though I am on the slow path to a quiet exit. Not that the world will realize; after all, I have effectively put off most readers by my idiosyncracy, not to mention my irregularity.

'Tis a weird sort of thing, this creation of mine. I wonder what can be gleaned from it when I am not writing fiction, which is a rarity these days. The veil I use to cover the true events from my life is so thick that there are now writings that I myself cannot decipher. The events and memories they entail have long slipped away into the recesses of my mind, and now they are inseparable from fiction. I think that is a sad fate, for no doubt there was something in them if they were able to prompt a post from me (especially given how lax I seem to be in writing anything at all).

I half thought of hanging up my boots here and now - what better time than the start of a new year to do away with the baggage of years gone by? I am not quite sure what has stopped me; some silly belief that there will somehow be another glorious patch as there was this time last year. Regardless, I suppose that means I am not over and done with it just yet. The future's uncertain and the end is always near!