Sadness, anger, bitterness, these all still exist, but compared to the Time of No Reply, there is at least now a separation of concerns. Where once every ill and flaw appeared manifest in my self image, and left me reeling under their combined weight, now at least I am better able to place the origins of every dark thought that comes this way. A poor choice of what to do with my mind no longer occupies much thought. I seem to have reached a stage where I can accept any future employ, without the toxic mix of inadequacy and futility that marked those earlier times. A poor choice of what to do with my heart occupies considerably more thought. Ironically, this is a disadvantage of having less time to worry about the former. But as with many things that once seemed insurmountable, perhaps it is just a matter of framing a better set of surroundings. I cannot shut out hope entirely.